Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
