Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
