My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Let's paint friendship bongs
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
