i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
