How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
