it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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