So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize