I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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