hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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