If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize