I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
