Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
The best revenge is premature balding
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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