Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
