This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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