she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
