So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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