Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I am naked and annoyed.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
His nipple licking is glorious
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