It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
