she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
