barbara walters just said penis...
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize