Sponge bath it is.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Randomize
