Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
