So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
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