Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
