I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Randomize
