Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
