I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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