What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
