Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Come see our sink grown plant.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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