new low.... made out with someone while peeing
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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