Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
