Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
