I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Randomize
