explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize