Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
