im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
