Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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