The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
