I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
