break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize