Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
