I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
