i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
