So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
