I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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