Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
