Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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