So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
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