We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize