You really coming over, don't trick.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
